The Aquaquarium

The second of a standalone series of original tales, set around a magical 49-floor shopping-mall, and those that work within it.

The Aquaquarium, a magical aquarium in the mall, sets up a new social media account… and immediately regrets it, when one of the members of staff takes over, and causes chaos.

This story is structured to mimic social media posts.

WORD COUNT: 1.2K
GENRE: Urban Fantasy
AGE RATING: Teen

WARNINGS: Bad Language, Alcohol Mention

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@TheAquaquarium

Hello, and welcome to the official account of The Aquaquarium!

We are the only real aquarium of The Mall, the best entertainment you’ve all ever seen! We have every kind of fish you could imagine, grand and small. We have magical creatures and magical mermaids and every kind of magic… not just Water! Children and adults are all welcome. Families and friends and even first dates… you’ll find exactly what your wildest dreams said would never come from!

Show up if you wanna s

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@TheAquaquarium

GET HACKED BITCHES!

I GOT INTO THE OFFICE AND STOLE THE COMPUTER AND THEY DON’T KNOW WHERE I AM BUT I LOCKED THE FUCKERS OUT! THE MANAGEMENT IS SHIT AND IM COOLER

THIS IS THE BEST MERMAID IN THE WHOLEEEEEEE AQAURIUM AND SO I DECIDED TO HACK THE ACCOUNT UR WELCOEM UR ALL WELCOME U ARE GONNA HAVE SO MUCH MORE FUN WITH ME!!!!!!!

HERES A SELFIE!

@Aquaquarium attached an image

@TheAquaquarium2

Ocellia, can we have control back? You won’t face disciplinary action right now if you hand back over the control to our account.

Please

@CherryHeart

This is the funniest shit I’ve ever seen on this account

@MissWillow

Just use your new account? Who cares about the existing one?

@TheAquaquarium2

Unfortunately, there is a large amount of content linked in the original account, and it has a non-insignificant number of followers already. We are in desperate need to get this back

@TheAquaquarium

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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@TheAquaquarium

GUYS FREE PIZZA IF YOU SHOW UP AT ELLALIE’S TANK TONIGHT ONLY TEN MINUTES BEFORE CLOSIGN TIME JUST CPOME IN THEN PRESS THE SEE MY MANAGER BUTTON AND SEE MY MANAGER AND SHELL COME OUT WITH SOME HELLA GOOD PIZZA I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE FINGERS DEF NOT CROSSED BEHIDN MY BACK

@EllalieTheMermaid

Hi! Ellalie here!

Please don’t!!!!!!!!

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@TheAquaquarium

OKAY I LIED BUT WHO GIVES A SHIT

@TheAquaquarium2

Ocellia, come out of your hiding spot and face us. We need to have a word with you, and we would rather it not come over the internet. Either answer your phone or come to the office. Right now, please.

@TheAquaquarium

GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUC GET FUCKED GET FUCKE GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDD GET FUCKED GET FUCKED GET FUCKEDDDD

😛

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@TheAquaquarium

Waoh this tank taste of vodka!!!!!

@EllalieTheMermaid

Uh oh!! Um. Do I need to get management to help you?

@TheAquaquarium

IF CAN FIND ME AKDJSKLDASADSDADSSADNK

@EllalieTheMermaid

Well! I tried

@TheAquaquarium

Kiss me on the mouth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WITH UR TONGUE!!!

@EllalieTheMermaid

No thank you!!!!!!!

@TheAquaquarium

Hatersr gonna haet 😦

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@TheAquaquarium

WHOMSTS THE FUCK ACTUALLY READS ANYMORE

@FEATHERTALES

WHY ARE YOU HERE I WANT MOREEEE SEX TOY SHOPS CAN U SELL DILDOS NAD LIKE ALSO FISH DILDOS ALSO COS I GOT A DIFFERENT COOCH THAN THE REST OF U LEGGY BITCHES I HAVE A TAIL DID U KNOW THAT I HAVE ATAILLLLL AND ITS SEXY AS SHIT IT MEANS I DON’T GOTTA WEAR UNDIES I GET TO BE ASS NAKED ALL THE TIMES AND FOREVER CUNTS

@CherryHeart

The vodka hit her hard

@EllalieTheMermaid

Unfortunately she’s always like this 😦

@Feathertales

Come at me @ThaAquaquarium

-Thalissa

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@TheAquaquarium

I HAT EBEES WHY IS THERE ANIMALS HELTER NAMED AFTE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES I HATE BEES

@CherryHeart

Are there even any bees in the aquarium?

@TheAquaquarium

NEVER!!!!!!!!!11

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@TheAquaquarium

The Slumbean kinda slays. KAYDAH U THE ONLY BITCH I TRUST

@Okaydah

Thank you, Ocellia!

You should maybe turn yourself into management!!!!

Also you can’t get a job here when you’re fired ❤

I’ll help you find a new one though ❤

If you promise no crime ❤

❤

@TheAquaquarium

Danm imma be homeless 😦

@Okaydah

Possibly!

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@TheAquaquarium

IM BACK ON STAGE IN MY TANK COME AND WATCH MY SHOW AND MY SEXY ASS AND MY SHOW AND MY SEXY ASS AND ALSO THE TITS IVE DECIDED NOT TO COVER ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

I BLOW BUBBLES AND DO OTHER COOL SHIT

ALLLLLL SORTS OF COOL SHIT!!!!!!!11

@TheAquaquarium shared a video

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@TheAquaquarium

Our apologies.

Our account was taken over by what the internet calls a ‘troll’. We have scolded the culprit greatly, and taken away her vodka-in-the-tank privileges, which she had won in a poker game and probably should not have been allowed to maintain for so long.

However, she is too popular of a performer to lose.

Come see Ocellia Flicke every weeknight at 7pm for her star performance, or she might get fired for disgusting insubordination!

Thank you kindly, from Management.